Notes Scrawled on My Rosters to Help Me Remember Student Names

Yep. That's what this is. And they almost all refer to white dudes, because there's so damn many of them, and so many of them are named Jason or Justin or Matthew or Micah or Caleb, that I need notes to match faces with names.

Caterpillar brows
Sleepy Michelle Obama
Looks smooth
Dave Grohl as a nerd
Michael Cera, black hair
Bill Paxton
Gay Paul Dano
Son of The Edge and Josh Brolin
Steve Nieve
Raising Arizona escapee
Schlump
Swedish
Eye problem
Owen Wilson
Skinny jeans
Dirty Sandra Bullock
Britpop
Gene Wilder
Buzz ruddy
Like Michael Phelps
Casey Affleck
Brad Paisley
Young Dwight Schrute
Dude from gum ad
Carrey’s pal in The Truman Show
Old
Nerd, glasses
Thin blonde Andy Garcia
Farm
Cable Guy
Buzz
Rivers Cuomo + Ben Gibbard
Thin Anthony Edwards
Red
That hair
Nephew Jason
Neck hair
Drunk?
Coal miner
Moby
John Belushi + Artie Lange
Elf
Frat
Big baby
Martin Short + Thom Yorke