An Early-Spring Morning's Dream

Hola, amigos.  Been a long time since I rapped at ya, but my reading's been slow and eclectic lately, so I haven't read in a specific genre in any sufficient number to make a worthy blog-post from.  Plus, there's the I'm-a-lazy-douchebag thing, too, which is hard to get around.

But, I had a very weird dream-experience this weekend that I think will creep you out something heavy, and if there's anything I really love doing, it's creeping people out, so I figured I'd share it.

First, a little background.  I'm prone to dreams-within-dreams.  It's not uncommon to spend a whole night dreaming something, then dreaming I wake up from it and am telling somebody about the dream I just had... only to find out that's a dream, too, and then I wake up from that... into yet another dream.  Over and over.  I'll sometimes chain a dozen dreams together like that, and I'll even become aware that I'm doing it and wonder when I'll actually wake up.  It'll get ya to stop trusting reality for a while.   It may be because I spend so much time thinking of plots for things, but a lot of my dreams have plots to them... sometimes even complicated ones.  Which is good, because I can use those to write stories or whatever.

So, okay, around four or five months ago I had a night of these dream-within-dream things about this pretty blonde girl in a white nightgown, who was missing her two front teeth.  Other than the missing teeth, she was beautiful... but, she hated my guts for some reason.  And she kept harassing me through these dreams until I figured out I was dreaming, so she led me out into my back yard in the middle of the night and explained that she wasn't a dream, she was real, and we were really out in my back yard, and she was never going to stop trying to wreck my life -- she was going to kill all my friends, kill my pets, wreck my bank account, trash my house, destroy my stuff, screw up my job, wreck my health, etc.  Just sheer, calm, matter-of-fact malevolence.  And through the dream she was very adamant that she was real, and she'd try over and over again to prove it by leaving something from a dream in my house so I'd find it when I woke up... but, o' course, those things I found when I "woke up" were just another in the chain of dreams I was having that night.

Anyway, pretty freaky stuff, but I quickly forgot about the dream(s) and only vaguely remember it.

So, four or five months later - this Saturday morning - I went to bed about 4 a.m. after trying to watch a movie all night (Relentless with Judd Nelson, if you're curious) and sleeping through it (I'm bad about that).   Then I started having some dumb dream about having to take a test that I wasn't ready for, and I was trying to study for it but I didn't really know what it was about.  And it was being given at a radio station where I used to work.  The dream had several ridiculous sub-plots, one of which was that a bunch of weird animals were gathering around the pen where my dogs live.  My dogs are really old (like 17) and creaky so I was kinda worried these animals might hurt them, but they seemed peaceful enough, and they were outside the fence.  There were a couple of German Shepherds, a big yellow long-haired cat I thought might be a lynx, a fox, and a Siamese cat that was completely insane -- it kept rolling its eyes and biting at the air, and it was simultaneously scary and hilarious.

Anyway, after dealing with this weird test, I looked out and all the animals had gone except the fox and the lynx... and the lynx was now inside the dog pen.  It was laying on top of an air-conditioner unit, being peaceful, but I worried it might hurt my dogs so I grabbed a pellet gun (totally inadequate but the only weapon handy at the time) and went out, yelling at it and trying to chase it off.  The lynx looked very amused and jumped down off the air conditioner unit and went over to my dogs, and I start screaming at it, thinking it's going to hurt them.  But, it started playing with them.

I'm still yelling at it that I'm going to kill it, and it suddenly turns into this blonde girl in a white nightgown, who looked vaguely familiar.  Then she smiles at me and says, "Oops!  Broken teeth!  Remember?"   And she's missing her two front teeth, and suddenly I remembered the dream I had months ago and get this massive chill.  She jumps over the fence and runs away with the fox, laughing like crazy.

I woke up, glad the sun was already up when I woke up, or I'd've probably been a little scared to turn on the light because she might've been sitting there.

The freaky thing is, I'm not sure I actually dreamed the stuff months ago... in fact, I'm pretty certain it was a vague false-memory that the dream I had this weekend implanted right at the end, just so that "Remember?" punchline would work.  Usually I write down any dreams I have because I can use 'em, and I never wrote down that first dream... so, I'm thinking it's a fake memory.  But, I appreciate my subconscious throwing me a swerve like that, because I actually like a good nightmare...

...unless I have another dream where the girl with the missing front teeth shows up.  Now that I've documented it, I'd really have to be disturbed that some evil dream-chick is playing sleep-games with me...